Daytona Beach Senior AdvisorWhat are the signs that living alone is no longer safe?
Falls or near-falls, missed medications, weight loss or an empty refrigerator, unpaid bills, getting lost while driving, scorched pans, and withdrawal from friends and church are the most common signs.
One sign can be a bad week. A pattern of two or three across a month is a reason to act, and a doctor's visit is a good first step because infections, medication side effects and depression can look like decline.
What are the options short of moving?
Adding paid home care for bathing, meals and errands, Medicare home health after an illness, adult day care on weekdays, meal delivery, a medical alert device and medication dispensers can all make living alone safer for a while.
| Hours of paid help per week | Monthly cost at $32/hour | Versus the $5,500 assisted living median |
|---|---|---|
| 8 | $1,109 | less |
| 16 | $2,219 | less |
| 24 | $3,328 | less |
| 32 | $4,437 | less |
| 44 | $6,101 | more |
| 60 | $8,320 | more |
| 84 | $11,648 | more |
| 168 | $23,296 | more |
Once help is needed at unpredictable hours or overnight, the cost of staying home climbs quickly.
When is assisted living the better answer?
When help is needed several times a day at unpredictable times, nights are unsafe, isolation is affecting health, or the family caregiver cannot keep up; assisted living provides staff on site day and night plus meals and activities.
The 105 licensed ALFs here range from 5 to 190 beds; 18 are in Palm Coast, 13 are in Port Orange, 12 are in Daytona Beach, and 8 hold LMH, 11 LNS and 3 ECC licenses.
How do we talk to a parent about it?
Start with what the parent wants to protect, such as independence, the house or a pet, talk about specific incidents rather than general decline, involve the doctor, and offer choices rather than a decision already made.
A trial respite stay of a week or two in an ALF can turn an abstract fear into a concrete experience, and many facilities offer one.
Who can help locally?
ElderSource, the Aging and Disability Resource Center for Volusia and Flagler (1-888-242-4464), screens for services and Medicaid; its partners, the Council on Aging of Volusia County and Flagler County Senior Services, provide meals and in-home help; and a senior advisor can compare licensed options.
If you suspect self-neglect that puts your parent at risk, the Florida Abuse Hotline (1-800-962-2873) takes those reports too.
At a glance
| A good plan includes | A good plan avoids | |
|---|---|---|
| Timing | Acting on a pattern of signs | Waiting for a fall or hospital stay |
| Choice | Your parent's priorities and a trial stay | A decision made without them |
| Help | ElderSource, the doctor and licensed providers | Unlicensed care arranged by word of mouth |
Sources: Chapters 408, 429 and 651, Florida Statutes; Florida Administrative Code chapters 59A-36 and 65A-2; publications of AHCA, DCF, OIR and the Department of Elder Affairs; and the CareScout and VA tables named on the page. See our editorial standards for how figures are checked.
